It must be said that parents are the number one factor in a child’s life, a parent is a person who brings up and cares for another. However, being a parent does not necessarily mean that you biologically passed your genetics to a child. A parent can take on different forms, such as stepparent, grandparent, legal guardian, or a combination.
The proper role of the parent is to provide encouragement, support, and access to activities that enable the child to master key developmental tasks. As the child matures and develops mastery the scaffolding is removed or changed to allow the child to become more independent.
To my amazement such roles are been neglected by some parents, in the world where we have so much of societal bullies, a parent should take caution and do everything in their grasp to protect their children, because of expectations some parents pressurized their kids into someone they are not.
Comparison is one of the ways parents influences inferiority complex in their kids, you can’t have two kids and expect them to act and be the same, even if they are twins, we are all born individually with different aspirations, hobbies, likes & dislikes, dreams and all. Child A is an intelligent kid and handsome kid, always the top in class, while his sibling child B is someone with a lower IQ and average looks, but instead of you as a parent to be magnanimous and be a good example to both kids, you started comparing the two kids together, making the younger one feel inferior to his siblings, the feeling of inferiority leads to depression as the kid will start having several thoughts, *“ why am I not as handsome as my brother”? “ why am I not intelligent as my brother “ ? * Of course this would have been a normal question someone ask themselves but when coupled with comparison by their parent it turned to a whole thing which can leads to inferiority complex and also enmity in both kids.
Expectations is also one of the many ways a parent can influence inferiority complex in their kids, expectations should be limited concerning our kids, you need to know the level of your child determination, is he or she someone that can aspire? Someone that chases a goal? The level of aspiration of a kid will determine whether they can deal with the high expectations of their parents.
Imagine expecting a kid that couldn’t solve fraction to solve Algebra?, if the particular kid is not someone that can work to earn a particular goal, he / she will break, then he will be like *“ why can others do it and I can’t”? “ my parents wants me to do this so much, but I can’t” “ if I couldn’t do it, will they hate me”* trust me when a kid starts feeling like this it’s already the apex, they have actually tried all their possible best, and at that time they won’t say it because of critics. At that particular stage a parent should know when to take a step back and console the kids with words like, “if you can’t solve Algebra, doesn’t mean you can’t do well in literature, what do you like doing? Reading?” But most parent will continue pushing and pressuring till the kid develop inferiority complex, or till the particular kid doesn’t know what he/ she wants anymore because they’ve spent half of their life doing what others expect them to do and not what they really want to do.
In today’s 21st century, there’s no short of societal bully from different social media platform, what a child needs is not pressurization or parental bully but unconditional from parents and anyone closer to them. parenting skills and behaviours have a positive impact on children’s self-esteem, school achievement, cognitive development and behavior, raising a child is like sowing a seed, you’d get whatever you sow in them. A good child will turn to a good citizen and a country with good citizen develops faster than a country with villains and irresponsible folks. Be a good and loving parent to your child, you are not only helping yourself but your country too.